Taking Too Long…

I am weary, God, but I can prevail.

Proverbs 30:1

(Apologies in advance for the long, detailed post… it’s been a busy few weeks)

I hope everyone is doing well as you read this blog.  It has been a while, and I hope your Fall has brought some fun outdoor activities.  The weather here has been beautiful most days and the leaves are starting to change.  The kids are all doing well, online learning is getting old, but they have settled into a routine.  The boys sports seasons are getting ready to come to a close.  Our daughter is in the middle of marching band season at college.  They are not as much a ‘marching’ band as they are a ‘standing’ band.  Nevertheless, she gets to go to the football games.  Most students do not get to go since they are limiting it to 1,000 fans. 

I have not written a blog post in quite a while, since before surgery – almost 5 weeks ago.  More about surgery later.  We wanted to first let you know we did receive great news.  The chemo killed the cancer, what they removed during surgery showed there were only a few tiny cancer particles that are not touching each other, and the hope is they will be killed with radiation.  So, Praise the Lord this was incredible news!

We see this as a true testimony to the miraculous work of God and the power for prayer.  The oncologist called with the great news, and actually said all the cancer cells were gone and felt I did not need radiation.   We were of course elated – could I really be done?? But no, the surgeon wanted to be on the safe side and make sure the little bit of lingering cancer was killed, so she wanted me to do radiation.  So up next, 5 weeks of radiation.  We are still in amazement at what God did and we know the radiation is necessary to finish the job.  

Surgery went really well.  Chris was able to stay with me until they wheeled me back, which was a huge comfort.   We cannot thank you all enough for all the prayers.  We could feel them.  We were sitting waiting for surgery and Chris looked at me and he said, “I am good with this.”  I replied, “me too.”  That was the peace we had because of your prayers.  Chris was called right after surgery and told I would be ready in less than an hour to go home.  Well, 4 hours later I had finally come to enough to stand and get dressed.  I have no idea what the post op. directions were because I was focusing so hard on just staying awake.  The car ride home was rough – I got sick as soon as Chris closed the door and that continued for a few hours.  Once that was out of my system, I slept very well and was glad I came home after surgery.   All in all, I think he was glad I was home too.

Now, on to recovery.  It is not going nearly as well or as fast as I would like it to.  The pain medication they gave me at the time of surgery and after made my pain tolerable for the first two weeks.  After those wore off and the real pain set in, life was not fun to say the least.  I spent almost all day in bed in the same position because it was so painful to move.   It was very frustrating!  The doctor said it would take about 3 weeks to recover, and at the 3 week mark I was still in bed counting down the minutes until I could take Tylenol again.   I started Physical Therapy and that has been helping.  I have something called cording under and up my arm that is causing some of the pain and stiffness, so the PT mostly works on that and mobility of the right side. When they cut through all your chest muscles you apparently have to work to get them back.  So twice a day I slowly stretch out my arms, chest and underarm area.  Again, very frustrating for someone who once got up and went on a 3-mile run every day.  But things are getting better and for the past two days I have been able to walk 3 miles.  I still spend several hours in bed laying flat to help with the pain.  

As the pain was not getting better and I was having terrible acid reflux to add to the fun, I had several pity parties.  As I have mentioned before, I try to remember to invite Jesus to my pity parties.  As I lay in bed, I sometimes cry and complain about how it is not fair because chemo was awful and so I felt I deserve an easy surgery recovery.  Jesus reminds me that my body is doing the best it can and He is by my side through all of it.  Still, it is all taking too long!

As I said, the next step is radiation.  I had my first “fitting” for radiation on Friday.  I was concerned because I still do not have full mobility, and I knew I needed to lay on a table with my arm up for about 20 minutes.  I called on many of you for prayer, and God once again got me through the procedure.  I would love to say it was pain free, but it wasn’t.  Even so, He got me through it.  Radiation will begin on October 26^th and continue for 5 weeks, ending right around Thanksgiving.  I am grateful that I will get to spend December free from treatments.  In January we will meet with the plastic surgeon to discuss reconstruction. 

The journey continues.  When this all started, I thought a few rounds of chemo, surgery, radiation, and reconstruction… that should take about 6 months, right?  We, it turns out it is a little more than 6 months – more like a year or more.  The good thing is, what am I missing out on, really?  We are all still staying home.  Having Chris home, caring for me and the family has been a true blessing.  He has been a superhero!  He has taken such good care of me; he is ready to do all that needs to be done and let me tell you he has done and seen a lot!  Nothing about cancer is pretty.

Thank you all for taking care of so much for us.  We are so thankful for your commitment to continuly praying for me and my family.  We could not have made it this far without your prayers, support, encouragement, and food- especially the food! 

Specific prayer requests:

That I will fully recover from surgery – by the time radiation starts is the hope.  That radiation will go well and I will have no side effects. That my mobility will return and I will be pain free.